If there’s one thing I can make, it’s chocolate chip cookies. This is no great feat considering they’re right next to scrambled eggs on the easy-to-make-scale.
I got a cookbook from my cousin when I was eight that was called ‘Kid’s Cooking’ which is still the best cookbook around (it teaches you how to make scrambled eggs). The only recipe I carried on making from that cookbook was the chocolate chip cookies. They were called ‘Darrell’s Forget-the-cookies-just-give-me-that-batter”. Darrell and I had a lot in common. The cookie dough went in the fridge for an hour before cooking, so I pocketed a spoon and would sneak into the fridge whenever Mom wasn’t looking to dig into a few spoonfuls of dough. This is after already licking the dough-laden stirring spoon.
My Mom bought this English Bay cookie dough once that goes in the freezer and I had never seen the stuff and assumed it was cookie dough ice cream. After eating a good half a tub, I got the worst cookie dough tummy ache of my life. It was worth it.
In high school I had a friend who would buy the Pilsbury cookie dough rolls and just squeeze the dough straight into her mouth. She was all business, all the time.
I think when I was a kid I had some kind of enzyme to breakdown cookie dough that has depleted as I’ve aged. I just made Darrell’s good ol’ cookies a few minutes ago, ate a pinch size amount of cookie dough and now I am on the floor, typing in agony.
Painfully easy chocolate chip cookies (chez Darrell):
1 cup melted butter
1 cup brown sugar
2 teaspoons vanilla
(mix this stuff in one bowl)
3 cups flour
1 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon salt
(mix this stuff in another bowl)
Mix the mixed wet ingredients into the mixed dry ingredients and add a bag of milk chocolate chips, stir it up and put it in the fridge for an hour.
(This is where you can start eating the dough. Be careful though- eating raw eggs is a controversial issue. Also: see above for tummy ache anecdote.)
Put balls of cookie dough on greased pan and bake in preheated 350 degree oven for 10 minutes.
BAM! Amazing chocolate chip cookies. You could enter a chocolate chip cookie bake-off with this recipe and win. Guaranteed. TRIPLE GUARANTEE!